I recently read an article that said spending too much time hearing about other people's great days is a good way to ruin your own day. I guess it is tough to see too many snippets of just how great everyone else's life is. There is the post that Johnny hit the lottery and Mary submitted Mt. Everest and Susie's 4th grader just got the Nobel Prize for chemistry. In the spirit of balancing all those people doing all those great things, I thought I would write about my day - my real day, the one that no one ever writes about. Here it is in all it's boring glory.
Stage 1: Morning. Beeeeep, hit snooze, 9 minutes, beeeep, hit snooze and repeat until I am woefully late starting the day. Then it is herding the cats, I mean kids, to get ready. We are almost 100 days into school, why don't we have a routine yet? Breakfast is served. It is nothing worthy of taking a picture of unless it is an ad for General Mills. We blaze into school just before the bell rings.
Stage 2: Exercise. I sit on the exercise bike and pretend to exercise. All the Surgeon General asks for is "low intensity for a little while everyday." I don't think I even worked out hard enough to hit that low bar.
Stage 3: Chores. I start one load of laundry though the pile is so high it doesn't make a dent. I head to the grocery store - holy crap, I may need to sell a kidney to pay the food bill for these hungry, growing kids. I pay some bills - holy crap I may need to sell the other kidney to pay the power bill this month.
Stage 4: Shuttle Van. It starts with the pick up at school and finishes with the end of basketball practice. In between, there is Tae Kwon Do, play dates, and an "urgent" run to the library. All told I spend 4 1/2 hours driving a total of 22 miles around town schlepping the kiddos. Most runners will finish a marathon faster than my net shuttle van speed.
Stage 5: Dinner Bell. There is dinner (again nothing worthy of posting a picture). There are baths. There is the last piece of homework that was "forgotten" in the afternoon. There is the realization that the load of laundry I started at 9AM still hasn't even made it into the dryer.
Stage 6: Day is Done. The kids are "asleepish." Scott and I grab our laptops. Why is it always night before I ever start getting the day's work done? An hour later, I'm too tired to do anything else. I watch a few minutes of Alaska Gold Rush even though I hate the show. Frankly, I am too lazy to change the channel. I decide I am even too tired for junk TV and head to bed. I set the alarm and drift off to sleep knowing full well that tomorrow will start with 3 snoozes, too.
That is life in MomZania.